I didn't see a lot of people at Synergy last night.  Hopefully we'll start getting some new faces and some familiar old faces without losing the ones that are currently coming.  I can't say that I know what any of you have been going through in the last year.  But I know it has been tough for everyone.  I've tried to show my support.  Sometimes I just don't do a very good job of it.  I try to be a friend, a "teenager", a teacher, a parent, a responsible adult... I struggle with what God wants me to be.  Maybe I wouldn't have this struggle if I just made some time for God.

I have to say that Gregg Moore did an awesome job last night at Synergy.  I also have to say that from what I saw, the student leaders did an awesome job when we broke out into groups.  I've seen a big improvement in the last month and a half.  In case you didn't go to Synergy last night, Gregg talked about depression and the affects that it can have on your life.  While Gregg was talking, I felt like he was talking directly to me at times.  A few months ago I was feeling pretty depressed.  My relationship with my wife had not been going very well, I was in a new job at work with new responsibilities, I was now a father, I wasn't motivated to do anything, I got angry at the dumbest things, I was going to school and the list goes on and on.  One night, I just broke down and told my wife that since I had increased my life insurance, I would take my own life and make it look like an accident so that her and my daughter were taken care of.  I was physically and mentally exhausted.  After talking with my wife, I decided to go to the doctor to talk about some of the problems I had been dealing with.  I wasn't ready for counseling, I have too much pride.  My pride is very difficult for me to overcome.  Anyways, I realized that I had been turning into my father in some aspects, and that wasn't who I wanted to be.  Don't get me wrong, I love my dad, he's a great guy, but he has his moments.  The doctor prescribed paxil and I have to say that I've seen a big change in my attitude.  I've seen 2 side affects from it though: 1. I get real tired between 8:00AM and 10:00AM and sometimes fall asleep in the middle of work.  2. I wake up in the middle of the night and in the morning with my boxers soaked with sweat.  It feels like I wet myself, its disgusting.  I woke up one night and had to change and go sleep on the couch, the bed was soaked from head to toe.  My wife will vouch for this.  I know I should probably go to couseling, maybe that's something that I can work towards.  Maybe for the time being, I should try to spend some time with God.  I can't believe how much I typed, I didn't even tend to do this, but obviously God is trying to tell me something.

Anyways, the reason that I logged in today.  Trista and I wanted to invite everyone over on Sunday night since there is no school on Monday.  Feel free to come over at 7PM this Sunday for some food, games, xbox, ps2, movies, whatever.  The girls are free to stay the night.  I would have the guys too, but I'm sure some parents would not go for that.  Call myself or Trista if you plan on coming 347-8028, or you can call my cell at 522-7661 or Trista's cell at 885-1827.  Here's our address:

639 NE Bryant Dr. Lee's Summit, MO 64086

Hope to see you all there.  This invite also includes the adult leaders.  So Tara you tell Matt that he can come over and play Xbox if he wants to.

Later